Best divorce letter & answer

 

Dear wife:
        I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show
for it. These last 2 weeks have been terrible. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. 
       Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favourite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & Went straight to sleep after watching all
of your soaps.
      You don't tell Me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me Anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone......
      Your EX-Husband,
P.S. Don't try to find me, your SISTER & I are moving away to Oklahoma together. Have a great life!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Ex-Husband
        Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good
man is a far cry from What you've been.
       I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
      I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing
that came to mind was 'You look just like a queer!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my favourite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.
       About those new silk Boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
       After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica , but when I got home You were gone.
       Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you Have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the Letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Gates and Free at last!

P.S.  I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl.   I hope that's not a problem!

Technorati Tags: Humor,Divoirce,Les Muise

GoDaddy Silences Police-Watchdog Site RateMyCop.com

 

 

 

By Kevin Poulsen March 11, 2008 | 8:42:42 PMCategories: Censorship, Cover-Ups

A new web service that lets users rate and comment on the uniformed police officers in their community is scrambling to restore service Tuesday, after hosting company GoDaddy unceremonious pulled-the-plug on the site in the wake of outrage from criticism-leery cops.

Visitors to RateMyCop.com on Tuesday were redirected to a GoDaddy page reading, "Oops!!!", which urged the site owner to contact GoDaddy to find out why the company pulled the plug.

RateMyCop founder Gino Sesto says he was given no notice of the suspension. When he called GoDaddy, the company told him that he'd been shut down for "suspicious activity."

When Sesto got a supervisor on the phone, the company changed its story and claimed the site had surpassed its 3 terabyte bandwidth limit, a claim that Sesto says is nonsense. "How can it be overloaded when it only had 80,00 page views today, and 400,000 yesterday?"

Police departments became uneasy about RateMyCop's plans to watch the watchers in January, when the Culver City, California, startup began issuing public information requests for lists of uniformed officers.

Then the site went live on February 28th. It stores the names and, in some cases, badge numbers of over 140,000 cops in as many as 500 police departments, and allows users to post comments about police they've interacted with, and rate them. The site garnered media interest this week as cops around the country complained that they'd be put at risk if their names were on the internet.

"Having a website like that puts a lot of law enforcement, in my eyes, in danger because it exposes us out there," Officer Hector Basurto, vice president of the Latino Police Officers Association, told ABC television affiliate KGO.

Since undercover officers aren't in the database, and the site has no personal information like home addresses, that fear seems unfounded. Chief Jerry Dyer, president of the California Police Chiefs Association, voices what sounds like a more honest concern: that officers will face  "unfair maligning" by the citizens they serve.

Sesto says police can post comments as well, and a future version of the site will allow them to authenticate themselves to post rebuttals more prominently.  Chief Dyer wants to get legislation passed that would make RateMyCop.com illegal, which, of course, wouldn't pass constitutional muster in any court in America.

Unfortunately for the startup, the company it chose for hosting is known to be quick to censor its customers. In January of last year, GoDaddy took down entire computer security website -- delisting it from DNS -- to get a single, archived mailing list post off the web.

On that occasion, at least, it gave the site's owner 60 seconds notice. GoDaddy notified Seto by posting its "Oops!" message to his public website.

"You put on my website for me to call you, when you have my phone number?," says Sesto.
A GoDaddy spokeswoman says the company can't comment on the RateMyCop takedown due to its privacy policy. Sesto says he's already arranged hosting elsewhere, and hopes to have the site online Tuesday night.

See Also:

• GoDaddy, Meet NoDaddy
• MySpace Allegedly Kills Computer Security Website
• GoDaddy Defends SecLists Takedown

Technorati Tags: Wired,GoDaddy,RateMyCop.com,K.Poulsen

It's behind you!

The amazing moment a couple had a close encounter with a humpback whale

By NEIL SEARS - More by this author » Last updated at 00:59am on 3rd March 2008

Comments (1)

Kayaking through the calm Pacific waters of Hawaii, all these holidaymakers were hoping for was a glimpse of a passing sea turtle.

But they got rather more than they bargained for when a mighty humpback whale suddenly surged from the depths and shot towards the sky.

Lucky to see one of nature's most impressive sights, they were even luckier not to be swamped by the huge splash when the whale crashed back on to the surface.

Scroll down for more...

Look out: The canoists look back in shock as the humpback breaches making a enormous splash

These extraordinary images show one couple calmly watching one of these giants of the sea as it raises its fin.

But when it suddenly slaps it down - sending a wall of spray towards them - they realise how vulnerable they are and think better of their proximity.

Digging in their paddles, they turn away. But the whale becomes increasingly boisterous, this time "breaching" the surface.

Clearly alarmed, the holidaymakers paddle desperately towards the shore.

Unexpected visitor: The whale puts on a show for a second kayak

Having a whale of a time: The humpback appears from the depths of the water

In another dramatic encounter, an astonished couple see a humpback soar up out of the water, its vast bulk - they normally weigh up to 35 tons - dwarfing them.

It then twists in the air towards them before crashing down just yards away.

The kayakers had headed off the coast of Maui, where the mammals gather to give birth and nurse their calves in the warm, shallow waters of the archipelago.

It is estimated that two thirds of the entire North Pacific population of humpback whales migrate to Hawaii each winter.

Scroll down for more...

Breach: The whale warns the canoists away from her baby

Scientists are unsure exactly why humpbacks leap out of the sea.

Some argue it is to scrape skin parasites off their barnacle-encrusted bodies, others that they are simply jumping for joy.

Their numbers dropped drastically with the onset of mechanised whaling, and it is only recently that the population has begun to edge back up to an estimated figure of 35,000.

So every sighting like the ones shown here truly is a gift from the seas.

2007 Foot-in-Mouth Awards

From - http://www.wired.com/
Entertainment : The Web

2007 Foot-in-Mouth Awards

By Ryan Singel 12.24.07 | 12:00 AM

Once every year, Wired News compiles a list of the most entertaining tech-centric misstatements and verbal foibles from government officials, CEOs and tech luminaries.

Once every hundred years, an upstart Web 2.0 CEO says something so ridiculous it rockets to the top of the list faster than a story about Digg gets to the top of Digg.

This century's momentous proclamation came in November when Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg trumpeted his social network's new ad technology, Beacon, saying:

"Once every hundred years, media changes."

Zuckerberg went on to describe how his company's mining and selling of Facebook users profiles would revolutionize ad sales, and thus media. Within weeks, Facebook did an about-face and apologized for not letting users opt-out of Beacon -- a system that announced to your Facebook friends what books, gadgets and movies you'd bought.

Journalists, advertisers and publishers around the world, however, took deep solace in knowing that media only changes once every 100 years, so they no longer need to worry about losing the new media war to free online news sites, blogs and YouTube. Instead, they just need to publish all their stories on their Facebook pages, until the next media change comes in 2107. Read More ....