People are funny like that.....: Best divorce letter & answer

Dear wife:
        I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show
for it. These last 2 weeks have been terrible. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw.
       Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favourite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & Went straight to sleep after watching all
of your soaps.
      You don't tell Me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me Anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone......
      Your EX-Husband,
P.S. Don't try to find me, your SISTER & I are moving away to Oklahoma together. Have a great life!
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Dear Ex-Husband
        Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good
man is a far cry from What you've been.
       I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
      I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing
that came to mind was 'You look just like a queer!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my favourite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.
       About those new silk Boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
       After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica , but when I got home You were gone.
       Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you Have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the Letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Gates and Free at last!